Dear 26 year old Me…

Today, and today only, I claim to be wiser than you. Let’s just take a moment and laugh at that! We made it!! We made it to the other side of obstacle number 1(And by “obstacle number 1” I mean: all those “you should be married at 25” statements, hopefully, they realize that’s not going to happen now so we are good. We can breathe and do whatever *Whew*). Y’all it’s rough out here… If you know, you know. Haha.

One day we will have a conversation about the stumbling blocks. We will talk about the “almost” business deals, the “almost” companies and the “almost” jobs. We will talk about the “almost” happy ever afters and the almost baby daddies, lol. We will talk about all the almosts and then we will smile… We will reflect and, maybe, we will cry. We will cry about the hurts and the emotional baggage we picked up along the way (Girl, what were we thinking?).

We will talk about the walls that have been so beautifully built around every curve that is you (You know, the internal Berlin wall). Then we will tear them apart, brick by brick. That one brick that was placed because of lies and broken hearts – yep, it’ll be gone – , the wall that has been elegantly architectured with bricks bought with the realization that the knight in shining armour was actually a villain – that one will go to!. We will talk about the bricks of indifference that were delivered by the ghost under the bed and the witch in the wardrobe … We will talk about the walls of pseudo-confidence that were built by deliveries of insecurities. We will cry over the truck full of losses and arguments that put it all together…

One day we will tear the wall down, piece by piece. Like the wall of Jericho, it may take a couple of marched around the city… One day we will… But today, today we do none of that. Instead, we remember…

  1. There is no road map to originality. You have to cut through the undiscovered forests to be uniquely you so don’t be intimidated by the giant trees!
  2. It is ok to be weak. In fact, it is important to be weak! The strongest people are those who embrace their weaknesses and use them to their benefit.
  3. You will fail. Not once, not twice but countless times. Remember to take your failures as lessons rather than permanent losses.
  4. You cannot be the smartest person in the room. That will mean you have stopped learning when…
  5. You should never stop learning. Take every opportunity you can to learn something new.
  6. You should never stop LEARNING ABOUT YOURSELF!!! You are the most important piece of the puzzle and you need to continuously identify each part.
  7. You cannot let your past define you. It is the past for a reason. You are not who you were 2, 5, 10, 20 years ago (in fact, you are not who you were 2 minutes ago so there’s that). The sooner you embrace that, the better.
  8. Don’t dig up the skeletons. They are dead for a reason. Leave them dead!!! It is not for you to bring them back to life. Mummies are a no-no.lol
  9. If you still pay attention to what people think to determine your course of action, you are not going to go far. See (1).
  10. Take RISKS!!! Take ALL the risks. Better to say “I tried” rather than “I wish I had”.
  11. Take care of all parts of your “self”. Take care of your mind, take care of your health, your heart and your soul.
  12. Don’t give up on love. “The greatest of these is love” was not put in the Bible for no reason. Jesus is wiser than all.
  13. Give all or nothing in everything that you do. If you are going to give mediocrity, don’t do it.
  14. Know you why! Walk in your Purpose!! Never stray from these two, they define your legacy.
  15. Prioritize family! These are your people, family should be your safe place.
  16. Take time to heal… “Don’t bleed on those who didn’t hurt you”. If you don’t heal, you will bleed in the wrong places.
  17. Introspection is everything.
  18. Be quick to course correct. Don’t wait until it’s too late. Learn to know when you have failed and when you need to take a break.
  19. Fill up your well! You cannot draw water from an empty well.
  20. “Forget yourself long enough to help others.” It’s not all about you, it’s about service and servanthood.
  21. Celebrate your wins, celebrate other people’s wins! Nothing is as rewarding as seeing the fruit of one’s work. Join the party!
  22. A “Principled” centre is a winning centre! Never forget!
  23. Know your Vision and Mission statement, then “walk it out”
  24. “He who fails to plan plans to fail”. Prioritize Planning!!
  25. Put God first!! Nothing, and I mean N.O.T.H.I.N.G., should happen if God is not at the centre.
  26. Travel!! Travel far and wide!! Travel in season and out of season. It is good for your heart!

Today… Today we hope. We hope that the brighter days are many and the darker days few. We hope that these 26 reminders act as a guide where we forget how to live [Because, come on now baby girl. I know you are stubborn but you have to accept the lessons you give to yourself, if anything. Just saying]… We hope that the past failures and experiences are building blocks, not to the defensive wall system though – we are done with the walls fam! -, building blocks to a live well lived. Today we hope that we inspire, that we try, that we live… Today, we hope that our existence epitomizes a full life. We hope that we live it out and, where we fail, that we laugh it out.

Then we celebrate! We celebrate 25 years of up, downs, lefts and rights (oh, man… That was so cliche but I love it. Hahaha)… And, most importantly, we pray that the next quarter of a century brings with it wisdom and growth!!!

1 Lesson a month – excerpts from my “A lesson a day” Collection

*AKA OBLIGATORY NEW YEAR POST

Sooooooooooooooooooooo…..Drumroll……. We are OFFICIALLY, OFFICIALLY WITHIN TWENTY-ONE-EIGHT (That’s 2018 for anyone who didn’t get that!). Why do we get so excited about a new year? Well, I don’t know *insert shrugging emoji here* but we do so hey… I am excited to be seeing another year and I am excited to grow further – and deeper – this year…

Well, while we are at the growth thing, I figured why not partake in this “new year, new slayage” excitement and share some of my personal “quotes to live by”… Well, not really, you can live by whatever you want to live by… But, here’ are 12 quotes for every month of twenty-eighteen (I don’t know why I just typed the year out like that but oh well).

(*) Indicate Nosi thoughts because you know I had to add some Nosi thoughts to everything, right? ahaha

January

“Whenever we frame our problems as things being done TO us we fall prey to the trap our ego has set for us” – Ayodeji Awosika

*Don’t let your ego define your purpose. You’re not the victim fam!!!

February

“Love gets messy and in order for a relationship to work, the people involved need to learn how to handle their own unique brand of messy” – Stella J. McKenna

*Aka stay out of people’s relationships this year… Just kidding… More like, relationships don’t have a one-size-fits-all approach. If you’re in it, be in it to win it and work your butt off for it!

March

“The primary cause of unhappiness is never the situation, but your thoughts about it. Be aware of the thoughts you are thinking” – Eckhart Tolle

*Your thoughts matter, the things you think about the most will be amplified

April

“Start your day with your number 1 priority” – Benjamin P. Hardy

*This is motivation y’all. One way to be excited about waking up in the AM is knowing that the first thing you’re going to do is the thing that is central to everything else.

May

“Find your boundary – then push it” – (Y’all I can’t remember who wrote this one)

*Ask yourself, how far do I think I can go? Then work at getting far beyond your predictions. Overdeliver, for yourself

June

“The normal Christian life is one of energy, enthusiasm, faithful effort and patient hard work” – N.T Wright

*Translate this across the board with ALL you do

July

“As long as you are living you’ve got to keep moving, keep trying, keep rising up” – Chef Leah Chase

*There is no room to be stagnant, you are above that.

August

“You will not always be successful at getting it right but keep trying” – John W Gray III

*Failing a couple of times is not a reason to quit

September

“Be willing to wait” – John W Gray III

*Speaks for itself, the best fruit comes when you wait. Think fine wine/triple distilled whiskey… You get my point.

October

“Everything you do with no real purpose is a waste of your precious time” – Thomas Oppong

*Ask yourself what the purpose/ your purpose is before you do anything. Then, ask yourself if the “thing” you are about to do aligns with your purpose

November

“Stand by your dreams. Embrace them. Believe them, and don’t let anyone mock you for them” – John Westenberg

*Dream loud, dream wild, then go ahead and live your dreams

December

“Don’t put your life off. It takes a while to figure things out. But that doesn’t mean you should quit” – Darius Foroux

*Simply put, today might be rough but it’ll get better IF you work at it.

Bonus quote

“No matter what you want to achieve in life, your actions must back up your words. If not, you will never achieve anything [worthwhile]” – Darius Foroux

*If you want to achieve something, put in the work

One more thing…. As we get into the new year, let us never forget that EVERY SINGLE DAY is a good day for us to press the restart button. It’s fun to set “New Years Resolutions”, aka the thing that I am not doing this year, but I hope that we never let a mere clock dictate how we live our lives!!!

P.S. I know someone out there was waiting for “that thing part 2” to come through, my bad fam…. My bad